11 September 2005

so i’m at starbucks this morning waiting in line for my grande latte. While i’m in line, a young girl says “excuse me” and takes an iced cappachino bottle out of the cooler then goes to the other side of the room and opens it and begins drinking without paying.

I look at her while she’s drinking it. She’s pretty in as much as young wealthy girls who steal can be pretty. She has on some low riding pants with the word “princess” written across her ass. Her grey t-shirt fits snugly on breasts that, if she’d been 10 years old, I’d have sworn they were fake. The shirt rolls up slightly at it’s bottom to reveal her midriff which is supposed to be kryptonite to most straight men. To me it just made me angry. She looks around the room attempting to be disaffected but only looking scared and lost in a way that makes me almost take pity on her. But I don’t. She’s a spoiled rich girl trying to see what she can get a way with.

While I’m waiting for the barista to make my drink, I’m completely distracted by this little thief. What do I do? … Do I let it go? Do I embarrass her? Do I rat her out?

I order: “Grande Latte for Tom.”

The cashier repeats my order to the barista “Grande Latte for Tom.”

I pay. She hands me change…. a dollar bill and some coins. When I start to put the money away, I notice I have 3 dollar bills and a few fives.

Driven by a force I cannot control, I walk over to the thief’s table and put 3 dollar bills on the table in front of her. I tell her to go pay for the iced drink she just stole.

She makes some lame excuse about she was going to pay for it. I said “bullshit”. I tell her she’s busted and to go pay. She takes my $3 and pays at the register and then brings me the change. I thank her then leave with my grande latte.

Why did I do that? What inside me couldn’t let it go? What was it about this little cunt that aroused my moral outrage? I wish I’d taken more psychology.

I think today, I just officially started thinking of myself as a grown up.